These last few weeks have been an emotional rollercoaster ride. The gloomier days where the sun hides makes me pause n I begin to feel-too much. I would hate to be a psychic n as much as I love the idea of aliens; I don't ever wanna run into one (or ghosts lol). I have been consuming too much n there comes a point in time where u have to pause all the noise n distractions becuz the shyt gets overwhelming. I remember January 2020 where I was up at 1 in the morning and in the dead azz winter time, it was 60 degrees. The shyt felt so weird. How and WHY is it so warm at this time of day n does anyone else find this peculiar-is what I was thinking.
Stillness is important. I had the worst feeling on my balcony last January where I just FELT something bad was coming. I didn't know what exactly but I just KNEW it's-something. March last year was the beginning of the pandemic starting wit lockdowns. Even then I was like wow...but not even corona was the big boom of doom my intuition felt. It's one of those when u know you'll know kinda feelings! I like being observant n we're in a gumbo pot of pondering to vaccinate or not; shyt feels like an east coast/west coast beef when u see people who care too much about someone's personal choice n rights to get the shot n feel the need to defend their stance on it **hands cookie to both sides**
We are so on edge that any n everything is offensive n we so "woke" where we wanna cancel EVERYTHING! We been having mass shootings every week, police brutality continues, racism still thriving, ketchup shortages, yall still got toilet paper to spare after hoarding em last year, allergy season is back, DMX done died, Prince Philip FINALLY died, Bernie Madoff outta here (they say death comes in 3's right?) and for the love of Ray J, we still have no closure from #Girlfriends
So as u can see...my brain needs a break from the world. I almost didn't post this week but I wanna keep the momentum I have with sticking to a regimen of dropping balls EVERY WEEK!! Kudo's to me. Even with all the emotions n feelings from the world that iiiiiiiii am feeling; I say all that to say...give urself some Grace & Space!!
I am moody, I can be distant, I have moments I don't wanna be bothered n it's no love lost from those who understand. When I am too social (i.e phone chats, FaceTime, dates, any time around humans for an extended period of times) I have to recharge. I plan #MeTime to recharge n enjoy my plants around the house which bring me joy. This thing called life needs some type of balance with all the happenings goin on in the world today.
Too much news can cause anxieties n have u analyzing shyt that aren't there (although I love a good conspiracy). I can always tell when I need grace & space becuz I have no desire to even be on social media. I will troll n comment n be all up in ur DM's but I'm not press to post on my own shyt. It's not that I don't have content...I just don't feel like it n I can't fake it if im not in the mood. We all deserve mental breaks from the world (and humans). I don't apologize for my absence like I used to. Just know if there's a gap of time where u don't see me...I am cocooning and once I emerge again, I can continue to be a fresh butterfly n contribute to the world. How are u giving urself Grace & Space these days?
