One thing I secretly pride myself on is...my reputation. It's always preceded me in a positive manner personally and professionally. It's an underrated strength to have. It's a measure of influence and social standing in society. It's a make or breaker that some people don't take into consideration until they need it for leverage.
We say "I don't care what people think" it's oftentimes taken too literal as if it doesn't matter when it does. We create n shape our reputations and ultimately it's constructed and developed on the perception of others. THIS is where u have to learn the art of controlling ur narrative becuz we can influence our reputation but we have no control over it and THAT is the part iiiiii don't worry about. Your reputation + image should be valued becuz it benefits YOU with greater opportunity yet we brush it off becuz we walk around with the mindset of...I don't care what u think to those not of importance to us personally. Interesting becuz u never know who u may need or bump into later. How Sway?
Well let's seeee; in HS and/or college that bamma u brushed off n treated like trash is now in the office u walk in for a job interview. Regardless of how qualified u are for the position; what would u do w/the power to yay or nay someone who left a bad taste in yo mouf? That chick u turned ur nose up to is now in the office u work in with higher rank n some pull to get chew up the ladder but lets be real...regardless of whether u carried em yesterday or decades ago-the feeling of how u made them feel is imprinted. Ur reputation for being a bytch isn't forgotten. Yes, u can swallow ur pride n work harder to overcome the "social abuse" you've done to others but whyyyyy! I don't know about chall but the old adage "it's not what u know but who u know" has come in handy in all areas of my life. I was able to hit up a past timer i hadn't talked to in years when I had a plumbing problem. If my car is on the side of the road I can rely on assistance at the drop of a hat. I legit have a network of friends/family/associates...people period that got me n I know that comes from being a great person and overall my reputation. Ask about me **Hov voice** I am good peoples!!
Heaux need to take ownership of the image created for themselves by themselves and stand on it. I found it chuckle-able to see Lizzo do her social media breakdown on folks comin at her but but but...what happened to the IDGAF what chew say n think of me attitude she projected n kept the antics of showin us her azz (literally) to kiss? I understand there is a struggle to balance a healthy self-esteem n not value the opinions of others but let's be real-we do care to some capacity!...when u are invited to shin digs the first thing u be asking is "who all comin" or "who all over there" cuz its some folks u just dont wanna deal wit right? You know folks who got the rep to always be lyin or the one who always havin a bad day and I don't care how much time passed or the possibility they've changed; they're always associated with their bad rep. When heaux complain about guys putting em in the "fun girl" category, I scroll their timeline n pics like YUP-they right, she looks like a good ol' time lol. How u posting "Dear Future Hubby" posts n all u showin us is duck lips n booty poppin poses **le sigh** Just like we do our research n analysis on dudes; they have their own network they compute us into n if ur reputation is being a "rolla" issa wrap.
"Check yo self before u wreck yo self"
I stand strong in my reputation n image becuz for the effort and time it took for me to get this far, it can't be easily destroyed. Slow n steady wins the race lol but I don't pretend to be anybody I'm not. I'm not doin antics for male attention n my sex appeal don't come from showing my body off for attention. I know being in this public space of blogging, it takes a thano's snap to be torn down yet I am confident in the ME I've built to maintain. There's just some shyt if yall ever hear about me, u can decipher if i did that shyt or not. Yall know me and I am consistent behind the keyboard to in front of ur face. I say some crazy thaaaangs but yall know i ain't doin nothing to jeopardize nor compromise my family + lifestyle. These are the benefits of having a good rep becuz the "Court of Public Opinion" will ride on yo side until proven otherwise.
I'd hope that when yall see I've RSVP'd for an event that u would look forward to seeing n interacting with me. I want my reputation to naturally reflect an outgrowth of the best version of me I am workin to be. I have the advantage of being apart of a circle of friends with great reps who also inspire others becuz we all need some positive role models.
Don't ignore the importance of ur reputation becuz it creates privileges others don't have. I know people shun privileges but only when it doesn't work in their favor. Your character takes years to build and gives distinct qualities to who u are. Ur reputation provides value and if u use it correctly, u can charge premium (i.e. dating market). Trying to juggle the character n reputation to see which one is more important can be irrelevant when u recognize they work hand in hand. Ultimately, how do you want to be perceived? Do u think part of ur worth is in ur reputation? Or could u care less about ur rep becuz other qualities outweigh enuff to make u a valuable asset? Nonetheless, YOU are responsible for it all.