kisha no e
Imma Cry N the Car
It's so funny when I find myself daydreaming about myself as a MOM. When I became one almost 16 yrs ago, I didn't think about everything that encompasses the title. There is such a great responsibility to filling that role we don't think of during the time of conception n I am still learning along the way years later. Today marks Mason's first day of school-again-as he enters the 10th grade **cue horror scream** EEEK!! Even he's surprised sayin it out loud.
I still see my sweet innocent angel as this precious little boy above. My heart just melts when they are tiny little people. Watching him grow into such a fine man is beautiful n scary cuz he's literally a branch of me. I love how we just have this bond as I balance being the parent n giving him grace I didn't get from my parents growing up. It gives me a better understanding into their world when I can have inhibited convo's to be in his world while teaching him the real world. We are beyond those infamous "first day of school" pics now that he's older n I don't post hoorah my baby made the honor roll posts becuz well...I know my child lol.
Is he a straight A student? No. Do I expect him to be? No. Math isn't our strong suit-my genes...my bad lol. I do expect him to apply himself with some effort. The same energy he does w/them video games lol. I make it my business to let him know I am extremely proud of him. He has been reading since four n his foundation has paid off. Sowing seeds early led to him taking advanced English this year. Aside from academic accolades, I take pride in the MANY compliments he receives when his teachers n counselors randomly reach out to me to brag on how well-mannered he is n has the reputation of being the good kid as well as a delight in the class. I've always taught him how he presents his parents when he leaves the door. We also discuss the climate of what's goin on in deez streets as far as the targets on his back as the rising black man he's growing to be.
There is no shortage of love Mason gets becuz he's surrounded by a host of strong men from my daddy to his, my boys n a plethora of uncles that stay on his azz **pause** LOL!! It truly takes a village n I give permission to anyone who sees him doin anything outside of putting himself n US in a good light to yank his azz up as needed. One would think I'd be used to these first day's by now but it doesn't get any easier. He got 2 mo' years before making me an empty nester...not that I'm counting **evil laugh** (And Am, lol). As hard as I am on him, I'm just as loving n nurturing to him. The male species lack affirmations n I am breaking that curse amongst MY sons. We have our mommy n son dates, random walks, movie nights n morning greetings to show I love him. During conversations there's no judgement n I am always cheering him on to be great n at his best. His maturity never seems to amaze me so sending him off as a HS Sophomore...**cue sniffles** Imma cry in the car!!